GOOD MORNING SKA USERS. IT’S TUESDAY AND THAT MEANS IT’S TIME TO ARM YOURSELVES… WITH KNOWLEDGE!!!
Greetings, my remarkably loyal and exceedingly delightful readers. Another brilliant week of NFCW Football has come and gone (joy!!) and that means a fresh batch of Knowledge Tables are available for the very low low price of ONE “Recommend”. Scroll down and pay the fee before partaking in the statistical bliss. I’ll wait here.
(Keal, can you put in, like, a pay-wall or something here to make sure everyone Recommends? Thanks.)
All paid up? Good!! STATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NFCW Quarterbacks (Ranked by Passer Rating)
R Wilson – 200/293 (68.3%) 2,505 yds, 8.5 ypa, 22 td, 1 int, 118.2 rtg
J Garoppolo – 160/226 (70.8%) 1,806 yds, 8.0 ypa, 13 td, 7 int, 100.6 rtg
K Murray – 203/316 (64.2%) 2,229 yds, 7.1 ypa, 9 td, 4 int, 89.2 rtg
J Goff – 192/314 (61.1%) 2,367 yds, 7.5 ypa, 11 td, 7 int, 86.8 rtg
NFCW Rushers (Ranked by Rushing Yards)
C Carson – 175 att, 764 yds, 4.4 ypa, 3 td, 5 fum
M Breida – 99 att, 524 yds, 5.3 ypa, 1 td, 0 fum
T Gurley – 92 att, 355 yds, 3.9 ypa, 6 td, 1 fum
T Coleman – 83 att, 355 yds, 4.3 ypa, 5 td, 0 fum
K Murray – 56 att, 308 yds, 5.6 ypa, 2 td, 1 fum
R Mostert – 55 att, 307 yds, 5.6 ypa, 1 td, 1 fum
D Johnson – 77 att, 300 yds, 3.9 ypa, 2 td, 0 fum
What’s changed?
I’ll tell you what hasn’t changed, Knowledge Seekers: The quality of The Real BKOB Report’s exclusive NFCW Knowledge Tables, only on SpikedKoolAid.com. I could obviously go on and on about how great my articles are, but I feel like I’m preaching to the choir here.
My Analysis
It’s Seahawks/49ers week – the rivalry upon which SKA was built (no offense to the AZ and STL/LA fans, but you basically don’t exist.) Although the results have been mostly one-sided throughout SKA’s existence, it hasn’t stopped Niner fans from harboring unhealthy levels of insecurity and resentment. Their attempts at trolling have been admirable, in the same way that mosquitoes attempt to troll windshields.
This year’s team actually has the Yellow Highlighting to back up their fanbase’s petty sniveling, but it hasn’t saved them from the the long, stumpy shadow of Russell Carrington Wilson – which has loomed over their entire season, lingering just over their shoulder like a miniature Jason Voorhees. Now he’s finally caught up to them.
As good as the Niners have been, they’ve only managed to eek out one more victory than the Seahawks (so far) and this week’s Monday Night Football match-up will be their first real test. The hairs on the back of my Boner are standing on end!
The 49ers’ are fresh off of a sobering performance in Arizona. Sure, they won, but big deal! The Cardinals punched them in the mouth, and the only reason they didn’t win is because they’re the Cardinals and they never win anything. The Niners’ weaknesses (turnovers, run defense) play directly into the Seahawks strengths, and Jimmy G’s 22nd ranked passing attack might not be enough to exploit Seattle’s one glaring Red Highlight category – let alone keep pace with the presumptive MVP. As an unbiased sports journalist, the 49ers make me want to vomit.
And now, how about your feedback? The BKOB Report has a monopoly on NFCW coverage, so you might as well post an Excerpt. Resistance is futile!!
Thank you, and always remember: Kill… Danny… O’neil…………………
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