The Real BKOB Report – 2020 – Week 13 Edition

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I apologize on behalf of the NFCW this week, Knowledge Seekers. It’s never fun to invest an entire weekend into NFCW Football and only get to see the Rams be victorious. Those are the lamest weekends of all, my friends. I first began doing these Reports long ago so that the Knowledge Seekers could make fun of the Rams without actually having to watch any of their games. And this is how they repay me? Bad form, McVay.

So be it. The Real BKOB Report is stayed neither by snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor darkness from accomplishing its appointed course with all speed.  Let there be STATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NFCW Quarterbacks (Ranked by Passer Rating)
R Wilson – 305/436 (70.0%) 3,479 yds, 8.0 ypa, 32 td, 11 int, 107.6 rtg
K Murray – 285/426 (66.9%) 2,987 yds, 7.0 ypa, 22 td, 10 int, 94.5 rtg
J Goff – 308/450 (68.4%) 3,372 yds, 7.5 ypa, 17 td, 10 int, 93.7 rtg
J Garopplo – 94/140 (67.1%) 1,096 yds, 7.8 ypa, 7 td, 5 int, 92.4 rtg
N Mullens – 165/245 (67.3%) 1,958 yds, 8.0 ypa, 9 td, 9 int, 88.4 rtg

NFCW Rushers (Ranked by Rushing Yards)
K Drake – 178 att, 768 yds, 4.3 ypa, 8 td, 1 fum
K Murray – 102 att, 665 yds, 6.5 ypa, 10 td, 3 fum
D Henderson Jr – 123 att, 559 yds, 4.5 ypa, 5 td, 0 fum
C Carson – 87 att, 429 yds, 4.9 ypa, 4 td, 1 fum
R Wilson – 68 att, 424 yds, 6.2 ypa, 1 td, 4 fum
R Mostert – 76 att, 388 yds, 5.1 ypa, 2 td, 1 fum
M Brown – 90 att, 368 yds, 4.1 ypa, 5 td, 0 fum
J McKinnon – 80 att, 315 yds, 3.9 ypa, 5 td, 0 fum

What’s changed?
The Seahawks are no longer the worst Defense on the planet! Whoohoo!

*sings beethoven’s 9th symphony, 4th movement (Ode to Joy) in operatic falsetto*

This is the type of joyous occasion I had envisioned when I began The Real BKOB Report many moons ago. Mission: Accomplished! *throws confetti at bob*

Now if the Seahawks can get their week 1-5 offense to join forces with their week 11-13 Defense, then we’d REALLY have something to sing about on a Tuesday Morning. They play the Jets this week, so that’s something. Alright, that’s enough about the Seahawks.

My Analysis:
The Arizona Cardinals, once firmly entrenched in the NFCW Wildcard position, are now struggling to stay above .500, and fighting (hopelessly) for their playoff lives as the 2020 season continues to slip away from them. Mwahahahaha!! That’s what they get for letting the 49ers move into their stadium. They’ve lost 4 of their last 5 games, and the one victory came via Hail Murray. Thanks a lot, Bill.

Arizona still has yet to play Colt McCoy and the mighty, might G-Men. We’ll see if they are up to the task, this weekend.

Failed RW-Impersonator Kyler Murray had a 59 yard TD pass against broken coverage on their opening drive. From that point onward, Knowledge Seekers, he averaged 3.1 yards per attempt. Disgusting. He’s had only 20 rushing yards per game during this 3-game skid, with 0 rushing TDs. This phenomenon has been referred to as “Rosen’s Revenge.”

Meanwhile, in Arizona, the 49ers are posing an unnecessary Covid risk to the rest of the NFCW by refusing to concede their remaining scheduled games. How very selfish and irresponsible for them. They only run the risk of spoiling their fans’ mid-season Mock Drafts. I’m petitioning the league to have them moved to the NFCE.

And now, how about your feedback? How has The Real BKOB Report improved your lives? Let us know, in the Comments Section below.

Thank you, and always remember: Kill… Danny… O’neil…………………



A Golden Boner Award Winning Journalist, known for his perseverance and bravery. An inspiration to us all.

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