The Real BKOB Report – 2020 – Week 17 Edition

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GOOD MORNING SKA USERS. IT’S TUESDAY AND THAT MEANS IT’S TIME TO ARM YOURSELVES… WITH KNOWLEDGE!!!

Well, Knowledge Seekers, it’s that time of year again. The time we have all been loathe to think about, let alone discuss: The end of the 2020 Regular Season, and thus the end of The Real BKOB Report. Ennui!

Now now, you musn’t be upset. Isn’t it a strange, sort of magical thing, that when the end is near all of the bad memories slip away and we only remember the good? Remember when I made fun of Jared Goff? That was a special, special day.

After today’s report you’ll be ready for whatever comes your way in the cold, wintry wastes of the NFCW offseason. When some nefarious trickster tries to tell you that Jared Goff is a decent QB, you’ll be able to stand up confidently and say “No!” That’s the kind of leadership this world needs. Strength through unity. Unity through Knowledge! And in that way, the Real BKOB Report will be with you, always.

So now, without further MayNERD, I give you the final Knowledge Tables of the 2020 Season. The very same Stats and Rankings we will be arguing about until mid-August – along with special, extended NFCW STATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*pounding percussive accents, rousing orchestral music, the shrieking of fireworks*

NFCW Quarterbacks (Ranked by Passer Rating)
R Wilson – 384/558 (68.8%) 4,212 yds, 7.5 ypa, 40 td, 13 int, 105.1 rtg
K Murray – 375/558 (67.2%) 3,971 yds, 7.1 ypa, 26 td, 12 int, 94.3 rtg
J Garopplo – 94/140 (67.1%) 1,096 yds, 7.8 ypa, 7 td, 5 int, 92.4 rtg
J Goff – 370/552 (67.0%) 3,952 yds, 7.2 ypa, 20 td, 13 int, 90.0 rtg
N Mullens – 211/326 (64.7%) 2,437 yds, 7.5 ypa, 12 td, 12 int, 84.1 rtg

NFCW Rushers (Ranked by Rushing Yards)
K Drake – 239 att, 955 yds, 4.0 ypa, 10 td, 3 fum
K Murray – 133 att, 819 yds, 6.2 ypa, 11 td, 5 fum
C Carson – 141 att, 681 yds, 4.8 ypa, 5 td, 1 fum
C Akers – 145 att, 625 yds, 4.3 ypa, 2 td, 1 fum
D Henderson Jr – 138 att, 624 yds, 4.5 ypa, 5 td, 0 fum
J Wilson Jr – 126 att, 600 yds, 4.8 ypa, 7 td, 2 fum
R Mostert – 104 att, 521 yds, 5.0 ypa, 2 td, 1 fum
R Wilson – 83 att, 513 yds, 6.2 ypa, 2 td, 4 fum

NFCW Receivers (Ranked by Receiving Yards)
D Hopkins – 115 rec, 160 tgt, 1,407 yds, 12.2 ypr, 6 td, 3 fum
D Metcalf – 83 rec, 129 tgt, 1,303 yds, 15.7 ypr, 10 td, 1 fum
T Lockett – 100 rec, 132 tgt, 1,054 yds, 10.5 ypr, 10 td, 1 fum
C Kupp – 92 rec, 124 tgt, 974 yds, 10.6 ypr, 3 td, 0 fum
R Woods – 90 rec, 129 tgt, 936 yds, 10.4 ypr, 6 td, 1 fum
B Aiyuk – 60 rec, 96 tgt, 748 yds, 12.5 ypr, 5 td, 0 fum
K Bourne – 49 rec, 74 tgt, 667 yds, 13.6 ypr, 2 td, 0 fum
G Kittle – 48 rec, 63 tgt, 634 yds, 13.2 ypr, 2 td, 0 fum
C Kirk – 48 rec, 79 tgt, 621 yds, 12.9 ypr, 6 td, 0 fum
L Fitzgerald –  54 rec, 409 yds, 7.6 ypr, 1 td, 0 fum

NFCW Defenders (Ranked by Total Tackles)
B Wagner LB SEA – 138 tackles, 3 sacks, 7.5 TFL, 8 PD, 0 INT, 0 FF, 1 FR
F Warner LB SF – 125 tackles, 1 sacks, 7 TFL, 6 PD, 2 INT, 1 FF, 2 FR
B Baker S AZ – 118 tackles, 2 sacks, 8.5 TFL, 6 PD, 2 INT, 1 FF, 0 FR
J Hicks LB AZ – 118 tackles, 0 sacks, 11.5 TFL, 4 PD, 1 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
J Johnson III S LAR – 105 tackles, 0 sacks, 2 TFL, 8 PD, 1 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
D Campbell LB AZ – 99 tackles, 2 sacks, 7 TFL, 3 PD, 0 INT, 1 FF, 0 FR
K Wright LB SEA – 86 tackles, 2 sacks, 12 TFL, 10 PD, 1 INT, 1 FF, 2 FR
D Greenlaw LB SF – 86 tackles, 1 sacks, 7 TFL, 1 PD, 0 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
J Adams S SEA – 83 tackles, 9.5 sacks, 14 TFL, 3 PD, 0 INT, 1 FF, 0 FR
T Reeder LB LAR – 81 tackles, 3 sacks, 5 TFL, 2 PD, 0 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
T Hill CB LAR – 77 tackles, 0 sacks, 2 TFL, 10 PD, 3 INT, 1 FF, 2 FR
Q Diggs S SEA – 64 tackles, 0 sacks, 0 TFL, 10 PD, 5 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
H Riddick LB AZ – 63 tackles, 12.5 sacks, 20 TFL, 4 PD, 0 INT, 6 FF, 0 FR
S Griffin CB SEA – 63 tackles, 0 sacks, 2 TFL, 12 PD, 3 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
P Peterson CB AZ – 61 tackles, 0 sacks, 0.5 TFL, 8 PD, 3 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
J Verett CB SF – 60 tackles, 0 sacks, 2 TFL, 7 PD, 2 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
D Kirkpatrick CB AZ – 56 tackles, 0 sacks, 0 TFL, 7 PD, 3 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
L Floyd LB LAR – 55 tackles, 10.5 sacks, 12.5 TFL, 1 PD, 0 INT, 1 FF, 2 FR
K Hyder Jr DE SF – 49 tackles, 8.5 sacks, 11 TFL, 0 PD, 0 INT, 0 FF, 1 FR
A Armstead DE SF – 49 tackles, 3.5 sacks, 7 TFL, 3 PD, 0 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
A Donald DT LAR – 45 tackles, 13.5 sacks, 19.5 TFL, 1 PD, 0 INT, 4 FF, 1 FR
D Williams CB LAR – 44 tackles, 0 sacks, 2.5 TFL, 14 PD, 4 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
J Ramsey CB LAR – 44 tackles, 0 sacks, 2.5 TFL, 9 PD, 1 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
J Reed DT SEA – 38 tackles, 6.5 sacks, 7.5 TFL, 1 PD, 0 INT, 1 FF, 0 FR
B Mayowa DE SEA – 24 tackles, 6 sacks, 8 TFL, 3 PD, 0 INT, 2 FF, 1 FR
R Sherman CB SF – 18 tackles, 0 sacks, 1 TFL, 1 PD, 1 INT, 0 FF, 0 FR
D Gardeck LB AZ – 16 tackles, 7 sacks, 7 TFL, 0 PD, 0 INT, 0 FF, 1 FR

What’s changed?
“What’s changed?” “WHAT’S CHANGED??” How DARE you ask such a ridiculous question when the answer couldn’t possibly be more obvious! I’m offended by my own article template. Ptui!

Obviously the biggest and most monumental comeback in the HISTORY of the NFCW – nay, the World – took place before our very eyes this season. I am speaking, of course, about the stupendous Seahawks Defense, who aren’t even the worst in the league at anything! Mission: Accomplished!

Don’t believe me? Talk to the chart.

The words “stunning and miraculous” get thrown around a lot these days. But that’s mostly because of the Seahawks. This Defense has proven that you can overcome anything, as long as you get a little bit of Jared Goff in your life.

This matches a theme that defines the 2020 Seahawks – the plucky, spirited squad who’ve weathered the storm every week, and proven they can win games any number of different ways, and who proudly hoist the NFCW Boner. No playoff team is more battle-tested than the 12-4 NFCW Champs!!

My Analysis:
Russell Carrington Wilson is the only NFCW QB to finish the season, even though he was the 3rd most sacked QB in the League. Interestingly enough, if you look at the Top 12 “Most Sacked QBs” this season, Wilson is the only one to lead his team to a winning record, let alone a Division Title. Knowledge.

Just like his Head Coach Pete Carroll, Wilson has outlasted several generations’ worth of NFCW counterparts. Since Wilson was drafted in 2012, the other NFCW teams have gone through 25 different starting QBs. Today, those same NFCW teams are scrambling to find a path forward, desperately swapping Josh Rosen back-and-forth, while Russell Wilson prepares for yet another deep playoff run. Some things will never change!

This year, under the guidance of Brian Schottenheimer (aka Schotty Too Hotty) Wilson set a new Seahawks Franchise Record for passing TDs (more than ANY NFCW QB since 2002 realignment), while his top receivers set Team Records for Receiving Yards and Receiving TDs. My, oh my!

The Seahawks offense as a whole scored more points than ever before, and they finally have healthy Running backs for their forthcoming playoff run. That’s something we can all feel good about!

Compare Wilson’s accomplishments to those of Kyler Murray, the other NFCW “QB” who started (but could not finish) all 16 games. Murray – who was once on pace to shatter every rushing stat for NFL QBs – managed to score only one rushing Touchdown in his final 7 games. His Rushing Yards Per Game dipped from 67.1 to 30.7 during that time. His average Passer Rating saw a corresponding downfall, dropping from 99.6 to 90.1. I probably couldn’t have done much better, but then again I wasn’t the #1 Overall draft pick. Maybe he should give the Oakland A’s a call, while he still can.

No other NFCW QBs are worth mentioning in this article.

Meanwhile, the so-called Rams backed into the playoffs with the least-impressive 10 win season in NFCW history. They struggled to pull off a last second victory, at home, against the partially-devoured remains of the Arizona Cardinals. Afterwards, Aaron Donald explained that they wanted to face Seattle in the playoffs, so that they could go home as soon as possible. That shows you where their priorities are at this time of year.

And now, how about your feedback? This is the end, my friends. But in a way, no it isn’t. I’ll be back again next week to recap the NFCW Playoff matchup between the Seahawks and the crappy Rams! A chance to undo the Collapse of Reality! I wouldn’t miss it for the world, and I know you won’t either.

Thank you, and always remember: Kill… Danny… O’neil…………………

AUTHOR

BKOB

A Golden Boner Award Winning Journalist, known for his perseverance and bravery. An inspiration to us all.

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