The Real BKOB Report – Week 7 Edition

835 425 BKOB
GOOD MORNING SKA USERS. IT’S TUESDAY AND THAT MEANS IT’S TIME TO ARM YOURSELVES… WITH KNOWLEDGE!!!

The other day I got into a discussion with a group of Knowledge Seekers from the wild and wintry wastes of the NFC North. And it got me to thinking: When did Russell Wilson surpass Aaron Rodgers, and become the Quarterback of the Future? When exactly did that “changing of the guard” take place? I believe I have narrowed it down to one symbolically resonant moment in time:

View post on imgur.com

Some of you may remember this play. It was the moment Russell Wilson declared himself the Crowned Prince of Awesome, rightful heir to the Favre/Manning/Brady Throne. Rodgers watched helplessly as his the frail remainders of his legacy withered away. The Seahawks had all but given him a 16 point lead and a Super Bowl berth. But he squandered it, and he’s never been the same.

I wrote an amazing article about that game, and accurately predicted Rodgers’ crisis of confidence. Go ahead, read for yourself. But then come right back.

Let’s see how the two have performed since that fateful day. I warn you, these Stats are graphic and uncensored. Viewer discretion is advised.

View post on imgur.com

Shocking.

Even with the benefit of two healthy legs and 119 extra pass attempts, Rodgers trails in nearly EVERY category, with only a negligible lead in Touchdowns. During this same time frame, Russell even found time to impregnate his pop-star wife – through means of heterosexual sex!!

Now if you’re determined to be a Knowledge Hater, there’s only a handful of lame excuses you can make for Rodgers. Here they are:

A) 44 combined games is a small sample size
B) The Seahawks O-line is way better than Green Bay’s
C) Darrell Bevell is way better than Mike McCarthy
D) The Seahawks Receivers are so super awesome
E) Christine Michael is way better than Eddy Lacy

Pretty sure we can rule out A and B. I think the strongest option is D, but it contradicts the efforts of dozens of troll throughout the years. Whichever one you go with, you’re deluding yourself. Stop trying to explain away the obvious! What you’re doing is wrong!!

That’s the thing about Knowledge. It bows to no man. It doesn’t matter if you stockpiled gaudy Stats with one historic, amazing, 122.5 passer rating season five years ago. You can only coast off those laurels for so long. Eventually the Knowledge will catch up to you!!

It’s a “What have you done for me lately” league, and throughout all of 2015 and 2016 Russell Wilson has been head-and-shoulders better than Aaron Rodgers.

Now enough about Stats… Let’s get to the STATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

View post on imgur.com

Passers (Ranked by Passer Rating)
RW (w/ 2 bad legs) 136/207 (65.7%) 1,559yds 7.5ypa 5td 1int 94.2prtg
A Rodgers 148/237 (62.4%) 1,496 6.3ypa 13td 4int 91.7prtg
C Palmer 142/236 (60.2%) 1,705yds 7.2ypa 7td 5int 83.4prtg
C Keenum 147/237 (62.0%) 1,708yds 7.2ypa 8td 10int 77.5prtg
B Gabbert 87/150 (58.0%) 890yds 5.9ypa 5td 6int 69.6prtg
C Kaepernick 29/63 (46.0%) 330yds 5.2ypa 2td 1int 66.2prtg

Rushers (Ranked by Rushing Yards)
D Johnson 146att 681yds 4.7ypa 8td 2fum
C Hyde 109att 429yds 3.9ypa 6td 1fum
C Michael 97att 406yds 4.2ypa 4td 1fum
T Gurley 134att 403yds 3.0ypa 3td 2fum

What’s Changed?
If we turn our attention to the Inept-O-Meter, we see that Chip Kelly is now gaining on Jim Tomsula in a few key Offensive Categories.

View post on imgur.com

Garbage time has done Chip a lot of favors the past few weeks, and it looks like the race between his Offense and Tomsula’s might not be as Cut-and-Dry as we thought. The non-partisan researchers at The Real BKOB Report will keep you updated every step of the way!

My Analysis:
Like all red blooded Americans, I hate ties. I don’t wear ties. I don’t talk Thai. And I don’t watch ties, because they make me want to vomit. They say “it’s like kissing your sister.” …Where do these sayings come from?? You see what ties do to people?!

But for a game with no Touchdowns and no Turnovers, there was one element that I found both thrilling and captivating: The Seattle Seahawks Defense. Carson Palmer and Company snapped the ball 95 times, and not a single one resulted in an Arizona Touchdown. Truly remarkable.

The Seahawks Defense is currently on pace to the the #1 Scoring Defense for an unprecedented 5th year in a row. Someone should make a movie about them.

And now, how about your feedback? Rumor has it that Jeff Fisher is on the hot seat. His refusal to apologize to me and the Knowledge Seekers is not sitting well with the higher-ups in L.A. Stay tuned!

Thank you, and always remember: Kill… Danny… O’neil…………………..
AUTHOR

BKOB

A Golden Boner Award Winning Journalist, known for his perseverance and bravery. An inspiration to us all.

All stories by: BKOB
2,828 comments

Comments are closed.