THE REAL BKOB REPORT: WEEK 16

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    Due to the Seahawks being mediocre, The Real BKOB Report has been canceled until further notice. Sorry guys, but when I started this thing I thought it was going to be non-stop staturbating over how great my team was. As it is now, it’s just no fun anymore. Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. -BKOB

     

     

    APRIL FOOLS!!!!

    Bahahahahaha!! I got ya good didn’t I? C’mon admit it.

    Nothing can stop The Real BKOB Report! Especially when it’s Tuesday and it’s time to arm yourselves… WITH KNOWLEDGE!!!!!

    Ok, enough chicanery, trickeration and misdirectionification. It’s time for the STATS!!!!!!!!!! With Special Guest Loser, CAM NEWTON!!!!!!

    View post on imgur.com

     

    Passers (Ranked by Passer Rating)
    R Wilson     310/455 (68.1%) 3,827yds 8.4ypa 31td 8int 109.3prtg
    C Palmer     330/512 (64.5%) 4,542yds 8.9ypa 34td 10int 106.8prtg
    C Newton    275/469 (58.6%) 3,544yds 7.56ypa 33td 10int 97.0prtg
    A Rodgers    319/512 (60.4%) 3,530yds 6.7ypa 30td 7int 93.7prtg
    C Keenum    54/88 (61.4%) 497yds 6.8ypa 4td 1int 91.9prtg
    B Gabbert    150/238 (63.0%) 1,677yds 7.1ypa 9td 6int 86.1prtg
    N Foles    190/337 (56.4%) 2,052yds 6.1ypa 7td 10int 69.0prtg

    Rushers (Ranked by Yards)
    T Gurley    229att 1,108yds 4.8ypa 10td 3fum
    D Johnson    114att 556yds 4.9ypa 8td 2fum
    M Lynch    111att 417yds 3.8ypa 3td 0fum
    S Draughn    76att 263yds 3.5ypa 1td 1fum

    What’s changed?
    Oh man, you guys really fell for my elaborate rouse. There should have been one dead giveaway though: The Seahawks are most certainly NOT mediocre! They’re near the top of the league in Rushing and Defense (just like they are every year) and they’re heading to the Playoffs (just like they are every year.) And this year, they have the added bonus of fielding the highest rated passer in the NFL, Russell Carrington Wilson. As long as that guy is taking snaps, I like Seattle’s chances!!!

    My Analysis:
    Unfortunately it took me all morning to figure out how to post that image in the first part of the article, so I have no time to discuss any of the games that took place over the weekend. What a shame, but totally worth it. You should have seen the look on your face!

    I’m sure some of the non-Seahawk teams did something noteworthy that I’m glossing over. I’m sure you guys can fill us in on the details in the comments section below.

    And now, how about your feedback? There’s only one BKOB Report left before the stats and standings are finalized! Make sure to tell me how much you love my articles, while you still can!

    Thank you, and always remember: Kill… Danny… O’neil………..

    AUTHOR

    BKOB

    A Golden Boner Award Winning Journalist, known for his perseverance and bravery. An inspiration to us all.

    All stories by: BKOB
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