Ode to Lisa

    1024 683 BLONKERS

    Farewell Lisa 

    Ever since we first met we knew we could trust you 

    Few times in our life has that happened

    and continued to ring true through the course of our time here

    You’ve been such a special friend to all of us

    You have been through many painful as well as joyful trolls in our lives

    no words can express the sorrow we feel because you are leaving 

    The years have flown by and though it seems

    you do not appreciate your time with us no longer 

    Maybe the between all of us it was taken for granted

    We are forced to look upon this upcoming change and new adventure without you 

    Same especially for you.

    Although you remain in our hearts and prayers 

    We will miss your friendship each day

    More than words will express. 

     

    Commemoration of a Life well Lived

    Born Margaret “Lisa” Featherbottom, in a small Connecticut town of Colebrook and raised on her family’s cattle ranch. Her strained relationship with her mother was a source of drama for her. Her mother was emotionally cold towards her and her father constantly spoke in riddles, while frustrating, led to her love of poetry.  By the time Lisa was an adult of 18 years, her mother abandoned the Stepford-wife personality and set off on a Woman’s only hippy camp in Montana. This gave Lisa the opportunity to leave the rest of her family behind and move to Florida.

    After time in central Florida Lisa fell in love with a man named Haddock to which they had 2 children together. A son Billy, and a daughter named Severance. Lisa provided a voice of reason to and a buffer between Haddock and Billy, who have difficulty relating to each other. Lisa’s continued devotion to family extends here on SKA with regards to Vegas, whom she thinks of as a daughter.

    After 10 years of unhappy marriage Lisa tricked Haddock into committing an obvious crime and convinced him to confess to it along with an earlier robbery. This would send him to prison for life, but maintain a false impression of the father as a good and hard-working man. Lisa then told the children he had accepted “a lifetime contract” to work on an oil rig.

    As a free woman, Lisa was set off to accomplish what many divorcees struggle to do. She entered the workforce as a substitute teacher specializing in teaching Italian. She believes that she can speak fluent Italian, but her actual knowledge of the language is dubious. Despite the boasting of her intelligence, she has been a victim of manipulation multiple times, such as being conned out of $2,500 for  phony degree in Italian. She was  also easily indoctrinated into a homogenous cult “MAGA”. She has been conned into participating in two separate pyramid schemes once selling Herbalife to cats and the other selling kitchen utensils. It’s also noted that in she was fooled into thinking a death row inmate was a former student, and tricked Lisa into smuggling drugs to him

    Lisa  is generally seen wearing sleeveless blouses and culottes. She wears a size 16½ shoe on her left foot, and a size 16 on her right. Her feet are the one trait she is deeply insecure about, despite the fact that it’s been said that such feet give her exceptional confidence, perfect posture and incredible athletic ability. She is gifted at softball, among other sports. She is also skilled at playing Boggle, and once won the Connecticut State Boggle Championship.

    Lisa prides herself as a cook. She has a habit of adding or changing ingredients to ordinary dishes then naming them after herself. “Spa-Lisa & Meatballs” and “Apple Brown Lisa” are some examples.

    Character flaws aside, Lisa is a kind person at heart who often works from the best motives. Lisa is completely devoted to her children and cats. Often referring to her Cats as the love of her life.

    in Summation

    A story dedicated to Lisa is not complete without proper respect to her love of the 49ers. While never being from San Francisco, she fell in love with rusty red and fake gold colors reminding her of the farm which he had be grown up on. Unbeknownst to her, the 49ers were about to begin a three year stretch of back-to-back-to-back NFC West Division Championships under then head coach Dick Nolan. Highlighted by the last game of the 1970 season 49ers headed to the playoffs against the Minnesota Vikings.

    San Francisco’s final score was a one yard run by quarterback John Brodie with only 1:20 remaining on the clock. It wouldn’t even be the final score of the game, as Minnesota scored a touchdown with only one second remaining to close the gap 17-14. Even in victory, the 49ers made it interesting giving up a score to end the game thus cementing her fanship as a 9er4life.

     

    on behalf of SKA Nation I would like to thank you for your time here. You were the mother we never had. Please dont be a stranger.

     

    Special words from the comments :

    BMT : You were a great man.

    K1: Stay positive but dont test positive

    Mosely:  will show  his dick if you come back

    FJY : I will show her mine again too, if she wants

    Vegas: I Love you

    Scotti : Peepeehands

    Todd: No comment

    BK: We forgive you

    4905: you look beautiful today

    Bill:

    AZK: smoke em if you got em

    Justin: Lisa you have big beautiful testicles . We need you. We can kill whoever you want we can feed them to my hyena.

    AUTHOR

    BLONKERS

    I am Trick Daddy in flip flops Cooking up them conch fritters

    All stories by: BLONKERS
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