The Real BKOB Report: Week 13 Edition

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GOOD MORNING SKA USERS. IT’S TUESDAY AND THAT MEANS IT’S TIME TO ARM YOURSELVES… WITH KNOWLEDGE!!!

Oh Glory Be, Knowledge Seekers! What a wonderful and glorious Thanksgiving week!

I’ll tell you folks what I’m thankful for: The long-awaited end to a fraudulent, embarrassing and criminally dishonorable eight-game winning streak for the Arizona Cardinals. For too long these imposters have been winning games without permission! Not only that, but their improbable victories have ruined many a good Tuesday morning by making a mockery of my beloved statistics! With each win, their statistical mediocrity continued to spit in the faces of Order, and Decency! WELL, NO MORE!!

It just took a group of experienced warriors, with Championship leadership; a team brave enough to bring the Red Monster down, never to rise again. What ensued on Sunday was a bloodbath. A Cardinal-red orgy of carnage.  And, oh, the Seahawks did FEAST!

Now with their bellies full of delicious Cardinal blood, they turn their eyes to the San Francisco 49ers. But more on that later. First, my favorite part… THE STATS!!!

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Passers (ranked by Passer Rating)
R Wilson – 199/313 (63.6%) 2,230yds 7.13ypa 14td 5int 93.0prtg
C Kaepernick – 214/347 (61.7%) 2,615yds 7.54ypa 15td 6int 92.1prtg
D Stanton – 81/151 (53.6%) 1,069yds 7.08ypa 5td 3int 79.0prtg
S Hill – 46/77 (59.7%) 499yds 6.48ypa 2td 3int 72.9prtg

Rushers (ranked by Yards per Attempt)
R Wilson – 84att 644yds 7.7ypa 4td 3fum
C Kaepernick – 75att 336yds 4.5ypa 0td 5fum
M Lynch – 192att 852yds 4.4ypa 9td 1fum
T Mason – 108att 445yds 4.1ypa 1td 1fum
F Gore – 171att 684yds 4.0ypa 2td 2fum
A Ellington – 196att 648yds 3.3ypa 3td 2fum

What’s Changed?
Hmmm… What’s changed? Oh, nothing I guess… Except RUSSELL WILSON IS THE TOP-RANKED PASSER AND THE TOP-RANKED RUSHER IN THE DIVISION!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME??! WHERE DID THIS KID COME FROM?!?!? The Ancient Mythical Dual-Threat Quarterback that you thought only existed in video games has come to life! I’m speechless. I just, I mean, you guys. I try to remain unbiased, but this guy makes it very difficult.

I’m sure Ras and Adusoron are throwing their EPA charts up over their heads, like Harbaugh before he realized Cox flopped. The fact remains: Russell Wilson is the King of the NFC West! And just like the great Mike Sando before me, I’VE GOT THE CHARTS TO PROVE IT!!!!

My Analysis:
The NFCW grindstone continues to churn this week, with a matchup between the World Champion Seattle Seahawks, and their former rivals, the San Francisco 49ers. Two franchises going in opposite directions down the stretch.

When you look at the stats, it should be no shocker that I am picking the Seahawks to win this game. The Seahawks are allowing only 19.8 points a game! That’s practically top-5 in the league! Meanwhile, the 49ers are allowing 20.5 points per game. That’s barely good enough to crack the top-10. Such a huge disparity can’t be ignored.

Both teams are on a short week, and both teams have to make the long trip to Santa Clara. But Seattle has the best passer in the division AND the best rusher in the division. His name is Russell Wilson.

Elsewhere in the division, the Saint Louis Rams also play professional football.

And now, how about your feedback? I know how much you all love commenting on my articles. Go on, don’t be shy!

THANK YOU, AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: KILL… DANNY… O’NEIL.

AUTHOR

BKOB

A Golden Boner Award Winning Journalist, known for his perseverance and bravery. An inspiration to us all.

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